Dating

The Liar’s Den: Let’s Talk CHEATING

The event I attended on January 21, 2017 located at La Madeleine in Sandy Springs, Georgia, “The Liar’s Den: Let’s Chat,” was something much-needed not just for myself as a woman, but women in general in order to bridge together this invisible gap so commonly placed between us. This was set as a preview of the book, which would shed some light together as a group on questions we all at some point seemed to wonder when it came to men. No, this wasn’t a male’bashing event or a get-together to talk about their flaws, but rather gain some form of group therapy that could eventually help us within our own relationships whether as a partner or even with young sons.

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As a Mom…

This is going to step on a lot of toes first and foremost but you know my heart, if you know me as an individual..so if you take offense to anything that I am about to say, it was not intentional but it needs to be said.

I went to Walmart yesterday in which I had a small talk with the sales rep there about video games. We got into a discussion about us both raising our sons by ourselves and the fear with living here in GA (ATL), just how open the homosexuality is down here. She was informing me about how she took her son to the mall (North Pointe) and there were a few men walking about in stilettos, makeup glam to the T and skirts. Her son pointed them out as “Boy Girls,” and told her (he’s 7) that he likes girls and that what he saw wasn’t right.

Now, I do not bash anyone nor their sexual preference because what works for you, works for you and that’s your prerogative. I love all of my homosexual and bi-sexual friends all the same as I do my heterosexual friends. Where I do tense up and become a little more “Mama’Bearish” is when I am with my son. The lifestyle down in the A scared the shit out of me, I will admit, when I contemplated on moving down knowing I would be raising my son with no male figure in the household.

This type of environment is new to him, yet he has been around a lot of male figures when we lived in Connecticut, so I am confident in both life and God himself. As a mom raising a young boy into a young man, it is very vital that we keep positive male role models in their lives. That was another thing we spoke on. Dudes who knowingly gets involved with a woman who has a child or children and then does not want anything to do with them..but only the mother. No. I’ve heard of some say that it’s okay to just be into the mother at first and not the child or children. As a single mom, I come as a package because my son is my everything to me. Any man who understands would have to respect it because you cannot expect to be in a relationship with the mother and have nothing to do with the child. I will admit, not a lot of men can deal with a situation like that and tend to fall off after a month or two.

It takes a special type of guy to go through life with a woman and her child(ren). Those are the types of people we need. I was thankfully raised by my stepfather who I have seen more as my biological dad, from the age of like 4 months until he passed when I was 14 years old. This was the only man that I knew as my father and he never treated me any differently than his own child. So, that’s the type of relationship I would want for my son…someone who is there from the beginning until the end of time, who will look at him and treat him as if we both made him together. No one has time to sit around and try to convince the bios, to be there when they don’t want to. Sometimes it takes a real man to step up and be there even when the child isn’t his.

 

Welp folks, that’s my rant for this wonderful Wednesday! I wanted to share some insight on what women as a mom, think of from time to time.

Ciaos!

~Sabrina

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#DatingAtlanta: Hello & Goodbye!

 

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How I feel when the conversation goes better online than over the phone!

 

I decided after not getting much of a response on the site that I registered with the other night, to try another app.  This one was known to have more responses and activity flowing, whereas I never heard of the one I had attempted.  So I created my account and within minutes, I had a few messages waiting for me.

Mr. Hello had messaged me yesterday morning as I got my day started running errands around town.  

Him: Heyyyy there! (heart emoji & smiley emoji)

Me: Good Morninggg (smiley emoji)

Him: I’m awesome!!! What are you up to?

Him: I’m B

Me: I’m Sabrina…nice to meet you.  I’m brainstorming of some ideas for a project of mine while getting ready to run errands. You?

Him: Nice to meet you! How has your experience been on this site so far?

Me: Well so far so good…you seem to be the most energetic thus far lol. I like it though. How long have you been on this site?

Him: It’s been ok so far!! What made you join? It’s different…

 I mean, you get the idea folks. So this conversation carried on throughout the day into the evening when he decided to propose exchanging phone numbers. I was okay with it so I sent him my number and he did the same.  Because of such a busy evening, I totally lost track of time.  He had wanted me to text him so that we could arrange a time for us to meet in person and have lunch one day. He ended up texting me in which I replied shortly due to me driving. Instead, I picked up the phone and called him. He was as energetic over the phone as he was in his messaging. It made me laugh a little but hey, there was nothing wrong with that. 

We spoke for a little on the phone in which after a few small …challenges, I felt as if…I wasn’t being myself. It seemed that if I misused a term while telling a story, he jumped in to correct my wrongs. He also came off a bit irritated with me eating in his ear, meanwhile, he had just finished a group of almonds (I only knew because he was smacking in my ear).

“Are you eating or something?” he questioned.

“Yes I am, how did you know,” I replied curiously.

“I mean, you’re smacking in my ear…do you want to call me back or something?” he asked.

“Uh..no, I was actually finished,” I answered, now turned off.  It was at that point that I realized he had an anal fixture about certain wrongs.

He asked for me to text him once I got out of my engagement so he could see what was up.

Oh, let’s not forget…I asked him in confirming his information on the site, “You have no kids, correct?” and his answer was “Yes, Team WINNING!!!!”

This disturbed me simply because I was a mother of a child and it was as if those who did not have children, were not “winning.” 

All in All…Mr. Hello was soon introduced silently to Mr. Goodbye!  I’ll be going out tonight in which I will take a photo before I leave and update everyone in the morning.  Until then, you all stay out of trouble! 

Ciaos!

~Sabrina

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How To Guide: #DatingAtlanta

Good Evening!  So recently I dismantled a long distance relationship with a young gentleman who will remain nameless.  It was not what I pictured and with hiccups when it came to honesty, I decided it was best for me to bring in the new year with a clean slate.  The title of this entry is called “How To Guide: #DatingAtlanta,” in which the reason behind it clearly speaks exactly what you see.  Atlanta is known to be flooded with women and with its ratio being so high (According to AJC.com, there are 80k more women than there are men), this is going to be quite an adventure ahead of us.

This evening, I have decided to bring you along with me as I begin a journey into the world of online dating.  A lot of you have heard of it and I am sure enough of you have experienced it.  Online dating can be fun and easy going at times and then a big turn-off and brutally overwhelming during others.  This will be the first time, however, that I post my dating quarrels online for others to view, so your interaction is going to play a big role.  

I will not inform any of these men who I meet on the site, about my journey in blogging it as I do not believe their reactions will be as genuine.  Those who I could really give a damn less about, I will inform.  I will also consult with a male friend of mine who will help me out along the way when it comes to digesting/translating the responses (from a male’s perspective)…we’ll call him “John”

So sit back and let’s get this show on the road! (more…)

Random Questions to Mr. Unknown

There are always times when you want to ask a guy a question from a male’s perspective.  It could simply be to gain understanding of how the situation is viewed or just to pick their brains.  

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So I reached out to Mr. Unknown and decided to ask him some questions that I know women always want to know.  Sit back and enjoy…oh and, subscribe!! (more…)

5 Ways To Catch a Catfish & A Twist!

Let’s pretend you live under a rock.

You’ve been single for some time and one of your friends convince you to create an account on POF (PlentyofFish.com), in hopes of capturing a beautiful woman to take you out of your misery.  At first, you’re against it.  

I’m not desperate,” you tell yourself.  “I have no problem finding a woman without the help of the internet!”  

Everybody’s doing it, man.  Hell, I’m even up there,” your boy comforts you.

So you tell yourself that after one week, you’re going to delete this account in which you’ve now registered “BigManATL,” as your alter ego.  Still reluctant, you first surf through profiles anonymously without a profile photo.  

No bites.  But once you upload a photo of yourself, the messages begin to roll in.  There’s one in particular that catches your attention though and there’s something about her eyes that draws you in.

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Love: Return To Sender

How can you love someone else or even expect others to love you if you don’t love yourself?

     I remember at one point, telling someone you love them to the point you’d die for them was the thing.  Those days have come and gone.  If you love me that much, you can’t possibly love yourself.  I may sound a little cold but hear me out.

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Cut The $h*t.

There’s always….1.

Have you ever had someone in your life who, regardless of how good of a man or woman you are, you were just never good enough for them to “lock down,” but just right for them to lay with?  Whenever you did go out in public together, it was never somewhere local when you would run into friends of theirs or even yours.  Everything was always so “low-key,” but they made it their business to pop-up anytime another took an interest in you.  Any other time when they would see you out, they kept it cordial, however when a man or woman stood within your personal space, they made it their business to intervene?
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Abuse.

stop-domestic-violence-copy-940x513Defined by Merriam-Webster Dictionary:

“noun \ə-ˈbyüs\

Definition of ABUSE

1:  a corrupt practice or custom
2:  improper or excessive use or treatment :  misuse <drug abuse>
3  obsolete :  a deceitful act :  deception
4:  language that condemns or vilifies usually unjustly, intemperately, and angrily
5:  physical maltreatment”

So when do you say enough is enough?  At what point in life do you decide that being taken for granted has run its last lap and you are ready to reclaim ownership?  Abuse comes in many different ways.
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Brain Before Booty…

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Or so they say…

One thing that I have learned since relocating to Atlanta is patience is of virtue.  There are too many times when people meet and rush into things way too fast.  When the “ships” don’t work out, then they are left standing there wondering …where did things go wrong?   (more…)