Destroy Her

What defines you as a woman? Who is it that determines whether or not you are emotionally, mentally, spiritually or physically capable of doing? Are you as celebrated as you deserve? At what point in time, have you been thoroughly and sincerely thanked for just being outstanding at what you do? Where has life, as a woman, taken you?

Definition of woman




  1. 1a :  an adult female personb :  a woman belonging to a particular category (as by birth, residence, membership, or occupation) —usually used in combination councilwoman

  2. 2:  womankind

  3. 3:  distinctively feminine nature :  womanliness

  4. 4:  a woman who is a servant or personal attendant

  5. 5a chiefly dialectal :  wifeb :  mistressc :  girlfriend 2




play\ˈwu̇-mən-ləs, especially Southern ˈwō- or ˈwə-\ adjective

The above reference, defined by Merriam-Webster Dictionary, summarizes the meaning of the term “Woman,” but I think it falls short of a few. We are lovers to people who have no positive intention on loving us back without something in it for them.

We are victims of rape and/or domestic abuse because instead of really listening to our mind, we follow with our hearts with a pure innocence. We are mothers who only want the best for our children and sometimes, even those who come into contact with them as we sit back and watch the many teachings we’ve provided, take its course. We are nurturing creatures to significant others during times when they may be at their lowest – we extend not only our helping hands but with the same trust we planted, we know all will be okay.


We too are providers to a household where our place of employment may not reward the hard work and long hours of dedication we devote outside of our family. We are leaders within our community. providing the same unconditional love to even the strangers around us. Kill her!

Instead of being identified as a caring person, we are labeled as being “emotional.” Isn’t this a quality of a woman – to express the feelings whether good or bad? We are labeled confused because of it, possibly doing to the lack of understanding or even communication to gain a better insight as to why we may act the way that we do. Yet, when a woman shows signs of being unemotionally available or emotionless, we are considered “cold,” or better yet, a “bitch.” She’s either giving too much of herself or not enough. Kill her!

Being a woman is both challenging yet very rewarding within itself, constantly morphing and evolving into someone better today than they were yesterday. How do you celebrate being a woman? Do you sit back and think about all of the ups and downs that you have experienced and find yourself thankful of each one? Do you take pride in being someone who can carry life into such a harsh world with full confidence and a desire to provide nothing less than your best even as a single parent? During times like this, you deserve a continuous pat on the back even if it is by no one but yourself.

The time has come where in today’s society, we are constantly placed against one another in competition if not by looks, then by age or experience. James Brown said it best in a song titled, “This is a Man’s World,” and even if you as woman, may not have faced challenging times when the recognition you received wasn’t due to your achievements but rather you accomplishing a milestone as a ‘woman,’ I am sure you may have come across the same stereotype in a different fashion unbeknownst to you. This isn’t a post about bashing men in the world – no – this is a post to bring into the light, the dire need to come together as women and help uplift one another. Celebrate the very existence of another woman because just like you, she’s someone’s daughter, mother, sister, aunt and even wife. Instead of putting one down, compliment her on the smallest thing such as her fragrance or even her smile. Being a woman is about bridging together the gaps that exist in the world, created by society itself.

Break the cycle of competition. What you see on your mobile phone are mere images created by various “trends” yet, instead of encouraging you to embrace your own beauty, they encourage you to alter your naturalistic being only to fall into the cookie-cutter replica of “perfection.” We as human beings are not perfect and should not want to follow suit of any false perception that would even dictate the status of one. We as women are dying physically to fit into what the community label’s acceptable with the perfect breasts, round rears and hour-glass shaped figures instead of appreciating what we all were blessed with naturally. 

The next time you see a woman, encourage her strength and lend a helping hand to provide her a new firm path of self-love and gratitude. Realize that we all may be pages from a different book but at the end of the day, we as women, share the same struggle regardless of our DNA. That reflection that has been plastered on the mirrors of our external home needs to go – so before you allow the ways of the world to kill her, grab her by the hand and show her just how important of a woman she is. LOVE HER!


-The Fire Jayde

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