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Mr. Ass Licker


A Tenderoni in a room full of Retired Men!

     So after I had my meeting with my business partner Jae, I decided to visit this lounge I typically go to on Saturdays.  Already being in the area, I figured why not, seeing how I had nothing else on my agenda plus it had been about a month since I last went.  I remember my hair stylist informing me that on Fridays, there was an open buffet with shrimp, crab legs, etc.  Even though I had no intention of eating from the buffet, I thought it would be convenient to just go and see what it was all about.

     One of the great perks to this establishment was the free valet parking for vehicles with women only.  This came in handy on those nights where you wore the 6′ stilettos and really didn’t want to twist your ankle on the way in – simply pull up and hop out as you pull your sexy Beyonce walk off inside.  The valet staff has always been outstanding with superb customer service.  On nights when it would be raining, they would welcome you to the lounge as they opened up your driver’s door and handed you an opened umbrella.  How many places do this?

Valet Parking Check

     The time was approximately 7:57 pm when I walked in.  There was no cover charge and the minute I stepped in, I clearly understood why they claimed Friday nights were always jumping.  It was amazingly packed inside from people standing up and around throughout the entire room, to the individuals sitting down enjoying their free food.  The buffet was set up on stage with the white illuminated flooring and bordered walls.  There was literally nowhere to sit.  I made my way around to see if there was a stool open at the rear bar (they have both a bar in the front of the room as well as one in the back of the room) and even though there was two, I had never sat in the rear so I went back up front and just stood around.  I messaged a few people to see if they had availability but it seemed as though everyone was doing their own thing.  No Biggie.


     I was dressed very casual with a mustard long sleeved top, blue denim jeans and my light brown knee boots.  My infinity multi-colored scarf accented my neck perfectly as I once again began to strut around into the area where I had last seen an open stool.  I asked the woman to the right if someone was sitting there in which she humorously replied, “No but I was hoping a fine man would sit there.”  We both laughed and she joked (or maybe not) about how standoff’sh the men were behaving in no efforts being made to mingle with the women.  She confessed to being lightweight (meaning she does not drink often) and was already done off after just one drink.

     I ordered the fried shrimp with dressing.  No drink for me this time – the last time, my favorite bartender had me wonder how the hell I was going to get home!  After I spotted her, we exchanged hugs and kisses.  I loved everything about her and the fact that she too was an Aries, this made our connection greater!  She’s also very gorgeous and from New York..look at that.  We have so much in common.  The party turned up, however, once I made my way over to her section of the bar.  She hit me off with a Patron shot and the games began.

     As I was minding my business at the bar, this older gentleman came up beside me and began to converse with her.  “That’s my secret girlfriend right there,” she told him as I overheard and caught on to the clue.  “So she’s yours eh?” He questioned as he leaned in closer to me.  “Sure is,” I replied.  “I bet that ass tastes good too!” He said, referring to my friend.  “Wouldn’t you like to know!” I teased back.  Listen, folks, I’ve been playing in this field for quite some time.  So if you didn’t know me personally, you would have sworn that I was a full blown Lesbian.  Then he goes on to ask me “do you like to be licked?” And for a second, I forgot that I was a lesbian.  “Not really,” I replied as he stared at me puzzled.  “So you don’t like your pussy, ass and titties licked?”  Then my ditziness kicked out and reality kicked back in as I replied: “Oh yes, I do!”  So he smiled with his old ass and replied, “take down my number.  I’m  here with someone on a date so I need to get back to them but you’re making it really hard for me.”  Even though I had no intentions of calling, I still took his number down and saved it.2016-02-06_14.03.42

     I’ve come to realize that no matter how much you tell guys that you’re a lesbian, they will still try to make advances.  So maybe one day I will have come up with a different story to tell but until then, I guess I’ll stick to licking twats as a side hobby (no offense to the real lesbians).  This concludes my night of adventures as a Tenderoni – but you better believe, this will not be my last post!!



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