Love: Return To Sender

The importance of loving yourself first will give you the opportunity to really know what you want out of life, instead of settling for all the wrong ones. You will know exactly what you deserve and will stay firm to it.

How can you love someone else or even expect others to love you if you don’t love yourself?

     I remember at one point, telling someone you love them to the point you’d die for them was the thing.  Those days have come and gone.  If you love me that much, you can’t possibly love yourself.  I may sound a little cold but hear me out.


     Love begins at a point where you’ve discovered the value of self and how detrimental your existence in this world really is.  You may not see yourself on the levels of others but rather your existence should be  should see yourself more valuable than even their existence.  There is something special about you that nobody else possesses and it is up to you to show the world exactly what it is.  You are gifted in ways that others are mesmerized by.  This could your ability to speak in front of crowds so nonchalantly and without worry while others clam up at the thought of people staring at them.

     So when you haven’t discovered what exactly separates you from others, what happens?  You try finding yourself within others.  You are now feeling complete with the companionship you keep.  You feel “whole,” and without them, you’re lost.  You do reckless things such as posting your business online or getting into domestic situations.  You have passed off that special power you once possessed, to someone who might only see its retail value and not its true worth.


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Photo Credit: IG – KMichelleMusic


     K. Michelle knows about this all too well.  Yes, she as we all have witnessed, puts her heart literally into her music as she tells us just like it is.  She is a scorned woman who has been used and hurt time and time again.  Before another man is given the opportunity to do it to her once more, she will use and discard them first.  

     This defensive mechanism works for her…or does it?  We’ve seen all of the men she has dealt with and none of them seem to be bothered over their breakups.  The messiness in blogs and social sites infiltrate the media with all of her dirt.  There isn’t a person alive who does not know at least one man that she has been with.  Granted, this keeps her name in the streets generating buzz, never giving her a dull moment.  But is that how she truly wants people to know her?  Are the poor images we see, the representation she really wants for her career and individualism period?  I don’t think so.

     Unless you’ve been living under a rock and really don’t follow anything she has going on, yesterday K. Michelle posted on her IG (@KMichelleMusic) a heartfelt realization for the world to see:

Photo Credit: IG – KMichelleMusic
Photo Credit: IG – KMichelleMusic

     Now whether or not she was being honest with herself, is completely up to her to follow-thru with.  Every woman who has been hurt and used could end up displaying the same behavior as K. Michelle so before you judge, think about it.  The importance of loving yourself first will give you the opportunity to really know what you want out of life, instead of settling for all the wrong ones.  You will know exactly what you deserve and will stay firm to it.  

     Maybe this revelation that she had helped her open up instead of being so cold (granted, it made really good music).  Maybe all of this time, her Mr. Right was on the outside waiting for her to let her guards down so that he could show her how a real man was suppose to treat her.  The most important fact is that she just may be learning to respect herself all over again and once you respect yourself, you will demand respect from others.  

At the end of the day, you can’t love someone if you don’t love yourself.  So before you think about putting someone else’s life before your owns, take that love and…




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